This is totally not autobiographical and I totally never weighed anywhere near 200 pounds. Don’t be silly. You silly readers are silly. On the subject of random jogging though, I am saddened that Winter is basically over and it’s warm enough for people to go on comfortable jogs in shorts. I know someone who got super excited at the coming of Spring specifically for the shorts, so in response, here‘s my parody of something only ten people would get.